[Bakiri Retsu]

It had been a really, really long day. After a warehouse raid, a run across the beach that she was still trying to forget and a long journey home Retsu thought she could finally go home and crash. Of course life had other things in mind and so she'd found herself having to return to the bay once more mere moments after she'd finally gotten to sit down on her couch. Taking a break had gotten delayed in favor of putting on her biking gear and setting off once more.

Cruising through traffic while occasionally yelling or giving someone the finger she came to a halt at a stoplight, prevented from ignoring it entirely solely by the truck crossing at the same time. One that happened to be bearing the logo of a fish company she was very familiar with. Her eyes twitched beneath her helmet. Could this day get any worse? The hum of a far more impressive sounding engine right next to her answered that question, reminding Retsu once more to stop tempting fate.

The sound reminded her of her very own Artemis. She barely got to ride it once before it was crushed by an enormous rock golem. She grit her teeth as she looked at the hyena man right next to her.

"Haaaah?! What are you looking at fookhead?!" Retsu spat out while revving her own engine, the resulting growl of her bike angering her even more. "You wanna go?!"

Whether he answered or not Retsu would never know, for the moment the lights turned green she raced ahead with the sound of screeching tires.

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Tags: roadhog

[roadhog]

REV IT UP! (Some theme music)

Howie had just come from a short beach vacation, still covered in sand and fish guts, brushing off a bit of it here and there that caked his leather jacket, sleeves torn off ages ago, leaving his weapons of mass destruction free to breath. Cranking the throttle as he at the light, he was debating on just running it at this point, how long could this thing stay red anyway!? His train of thought was quickly side tracked as a voice cut through the roar of his engine, realizing some lady on her toy bike seemed to have some kinda problem with him.

Glancing over to this pipsqueek mouthing off, Howie curled a lip in a grimace, revealing his jagged incisors clamped around his cigarette, the cherry smoldering red as he took another draw on it. The last draw, to be exact. Plucking it from his mouth with his claws, he stared at this woman from behind his welding goggles, before flicking the lit cigarette directly onto her just before the light turning green.

His tires spun against the road as he pulled the throttle, sending a plume of smoke up from a burnout, a burst of flames erupting from the exhaust briefly before he was off, rocketing forward through the light and onward to leave this jackass eating his dust, cutting her off as soon as he was able to, raising up a clawed middle finger and cackling back to her, "Might as well kiss my ass while you're back there, bitch!"

[Bakiri Retsu]

Retsu would've been right angry if she could hear him over the roar of their engines. Not that she needed to hear him to be angry mind you, no, the cigarette did enough to even promote her anger to furious rage.  She was half tempted to start throwing grenades at him. At the speed they were going though that was much more likely to just backfire on her. She'd need to pass him first. 

Revving the engine Retsu used her own method to win the race. Roads were arbitrarily decided strokes of concrete and paint meant to shackle and constrain one to a certain route. Retsu wasn't one to listen to authority, she'd follow her own path. If that meant veering off the road, crashing through a window display and back out through the other side to cut a corner then that was absolutely intentional and not her losing control of her bike. Seeing her opponent already catch up despite the shortcut Retsu threw part of the mannequin she'd ran through at his steering wheel, narrowly managing to keep her bike upright as she did. 

With no care for the fact that she was driving on the wrong side of the road she wove through traffic while shouting expletives at the honking cars. While she hadn't stuck around long enough to see if it'd take him down Retsu had a feeling she hadn't seen the last of the foul-mouthed biker.

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Tags: roadhog 

[roadhog]

REV IT UP! (Some theme music)

Rumbling through traffic, Howie watched as this woman proved to be far more destructive than he was... today, atleast! She plowed through the windows of a shop, leaving a wake of broken glass and terror, only to wind up neck and neck with him. But she knew how to play dirty, and hurling a mannequin head at his handlebars sent him momentarily careening into the side of a van, denting the side before rebounding off and righting himself. Now she'd gone and done it.

Yanking the throttle, Howie's engine roared even louder, flames spitting from his exhaust as he shot forward once again. From behind her, the madman on a motorbike came crunching overtop the hood of a car, making a b-line directly for her, no matter what stood in his way. Tires skid over the hood, before launching himself back onto the road behind her, attempting to close the gap. As the oncoming cars skidded in and out of the way, trying to avoid them as much as she had tried to weave between them, honking and shouting from inside their cars. Howie had decided to take a different approach, plowing straight over each vehicle in his way, lifting his front tire as they came up and tearing out overtop the roofs. It was a bumpy ride, but he needed to teach this bitch a lesson on who is the king of these streets.

Coming up behind her finally, he sped forward to ram himself directly into her back tire with his front, cackling his high pitched laugh, before swinging up beside her for a sideswipe attempt, then rocketing on ahead.

[Bakiri Retsu]

She heard him coming long before she saw him. For all the good that did her Retsu might as well have been deaf. Trying to swerve out of the way did very little either, making it abjectly clear that he'd run into her on purpose. She was so busy loudly swearing at him in response that she was wholly unprepared for the following sideswipe.

"Ah'll fook you up hair-for-brains you're gonna regret thaaa-"

Thrown off the street she barreled through the railing and onto the beachside road below. Zigzagging in a way that was totally intentional and not just her trying to regain control of her bike she passed by screaming civilians as she pushed her engine harder and harder.

"Fook off, ah'm busy!" Retsu shouted at the giant crab that was rapidly sidestepping by her side, somehow keeping up with the high-speed bike. She leaned left, dodging a claw that lashed out at her and taking the exit back up to the normal street. Keeping one hand on the stirring wheel she pulled her handgun out of the storage compartment with her other and opened fire on Roadhog the moment he came into view. "Let's see you outspeed a fookin' bullet!"

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Tags: roadhog

[roadhog]

REV IT UP! (Some theme music)

Running this bitch off the road was only the beginning of their tiff. With a sniff of the air, there it was again, that undersea funk, the crustaceous stank that he had just gotten away from. Some shit was going down on the beach, and of course their little street race ended up leading them right back to the sea stampede. Following after her path of destruction, Howie used the railing she had busted through as a ramp to make a jump down onto the beach below, keeping chase as she weaved through the people and monsters running around in all directions.

Cackling at the top of his lungs, he watched as her and her new crab friend sped on down the coast, fumbling for something. Surely that was no good. Speeding up to one of the other beasts, one in particular being a clam on two seemingly humanoid legs, Howie latched his claws onto the lip of a gaping shellfish's mouth as it tried to snap at him, bending it backward as he sped on past until it snapped at the hinge, ripping the scallop shield right off and guarding himself of the oncoming stray shots, flinching and weaving his bike out of reflex even if the bullets whizzed off of the barrier.

[Bakiri Retsu]

Clicking her tongue when the bullets clanked off Roadhog's improvised shield Retsu hurriedly put both hands back on the steering wheel before she lost control of the vehicle. "Ah y've gotta be shittin' me?!" She cried out when she was passed by a shrimp with legs riding a-

-Was that a tricycle?

She was just gonna ignore that. It was her loss if she minded it. 

What was much harder to ignore was the giant obstacle ahead. Retsu wasn't the most educated in the classical sense but since joining Pantheon she'd looked into mythology a fair bit. Mostly Norse given that its the one from which the Court she was part of drew its naming scheme. Looking at the snake-like beast's maw that nearly took up the entire street but one word came to mind.

Jormungandr.

Slowing down just enough that it was the cars ahead of her that got chomped when its giant maw crashed into the street she committed an act not unlike the one Roadhog had moments ago, lifting her front wheel and blazing across the thing's head. With the extra height she could see further and holy hells how long was this thing. Wheels spinning to maintain traction on the scaled form she skid across its body while the head tried to free itself from the concrete it got itself stuck in. It was wide enough that despite the incline there wasn't all that much difference from driving on a normal street, albeit the lack of proper friction made staying in control of the bike a bit of a challenge.

Still, it was almost downright pleasant compared to her ride through Nerima, like she was simply riding atop some kind of snake way as little sense as that thought made. Trying to maneuver atop the sea serpent had caused Retsu to overlook one slight detail however. She'd completely lost track of her opponent.

------

Tags: roadhog

[roadhog]

REV IT UP! (Some theme music)

Howie nearly spat as the behemoth came into view. If he wasn't paying attention he might have confused it with a building, but the kind of building that destroys a few city blocks at a time and eats buses like slim jims. The grip on the throttle hesitated as he approached, curling a lip as he rumbled closer, only to see the psycho bitch make her way right up onto the thing like it was a dirt bike track. Somewhere deep inside of him, a little voice told him this was dangerous. That little voice was soon jumped and beaten senseless by the other voices telling him to let loose. Shrugging, he yanked the throttle once again, driving headlong toward the monster.

Weaving in between vehicles that had halted to a stop in the wake of the skyscraper serpent, Howie soon saw his opportunity. It seemed that an army of fiends followed this monsters suit, flooding the streets with all matter of crustaceous, piscine, or cephalopodic freaks you could ever imagine. One particular monster, a Jellyfish walking around on its tentacles, latching onto whatever passerbys unlucky enough to be on the menu. Riding up the back of a stopped car, shattering out the back window as he rolled up onto the roof, he flew off of it like a ramp, dropping down onto the bulbous head of this jellyfish and bounding off of it like a springboard, launching him and his bike high into the air, aiming to crash down right onto the serpents back, tires skidding out from under him across the slick scales. Once momentum was back on his side, he rumbled on down the spine of the beast and toward the manic motor-maiden.

[Bakiri Retsu]

The rumble of a heavy motor behind her reminded Retsu that wrangling her bike so she didn't crash and fall to her death was a secondary objective at best, she had a competition to win. Beneath her helmet the snarl on her face wasn't visible but intense as it was she was sure it could be heard when she shouted back at him. From the storage compartment just behind the steering wheel she pulled out one of her miniaturized firecracker-pattern explosives with the same motion she used to put her handgun back in there.

This latest version of her firecrackers was efficient in its simplicity. A string of small fragmentation grenades that lacked the usual handle that came with said type of grenade each had their pin tied to a metal wire, the end of which had a small ring on it just wide enough to fit her thumb into. With a flick of her wrist Retsu craned back and threw her arm out, the wire swinging in an arc and sending each of the grenades flying one after another across the entire breadth of the sea serpent's back.

"Eat shit and die, fookface!"

A maniacal laugh not unlike a hyena's cackle wrenched its way out of her throat while she turned to face forward once more. Seeing what laid ahead it quickly stopped.

------

Tags: roadhog

[Bakiri Retsu]

Much like Retsu herself when she crashed into the traffic light in front of her, slamming into the horizontal beam with such force her legs stretched out in front of her while her bike kept going without her. With the breath forced out of her lungs all she could do was hold on while the serpent kept moving, eventually passing her by entirely. Stuck hanging there with aching ribs and bruised pride but one thought ran through her head.

How the hells was she supposed to get down from there?

---

Tag: roadhog

[Fanthes]

[nospaces]

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✨EVENT SUCCESS!✨

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✓ Road Rage indeed!! [break][break]
Retsu - 250 // 325[break]
Roadhog - 75 // 150

+ 75 TOKENS!

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Tag: Bakiri Retsu, roadhog

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